Sunday 18 September 2011

Be yourself / perils of a married man..

I understand why some people pretend to be someone else when they meet a potential partner. They want to hide their flaws and showcase the nicer aspects of themselves.
Yet, I’m not really sure how much sense that makes because sooner or later, that person will find out.
They will discover the truth..the real you..the mask will slip and if it were all an act, the person standing before them will be as unfamiliar and unknown to them as a stranger.
They may even end up resenting, or disliking you for it, viewing your courtship as a series or lies...or deceit.

Therefore, I think the early dating stages should be a bit like the old game show ‘it’s a knockout’, where you try your best to ‘knock em out!!’ have ‘em running for the hills, with a series of undesirable qualities. Eg:
I’m lazy
‘I tell lies’
‘I’m a philanderer’
and so on..
The one left standing… wins

No seriously...

I’ve said before, only you can be you
If someone cannot accept that, then don’t waste time trying to change their mind
Move on... eventually, someone will

*****
There are lots of reasons to avoid married men. Unless of course they are married to you!!

Here are a few

1. He will not be leaving his wife for you. Once you’ve accepted being a mistress, a mistress you shall stay. Why wont he leave?.. perhaps they have bought a house, or houses together, and their finances are now so intertwined that if he left he would not be able to afford to survive.. at least not live in the standard to which he’s become accustomed. Esp if they have children under 18. ( okay.. in a few cases the man has left.. but it’s very rare.. a bit like long summers in the UK)plus.. it's also possible, that he may actually.. err.. love his wife!!.

2. On special days.. like anniversaries, holidays, birthdays valentine etc.. he will be with his wife.. you will be alone

3. Regardless of how much ‘great sex’ you give him, he’ll enjoy it.. then still go back and do the same with his wife. ( As she's in his bed every night) Even if it’s better with you.. he accept whatever his wife has anyway, as he doesn’t have to leave his home for it, or be romantic to get it.

4. He will lie to you. There is no way he could really be honest with you , and not hurt your feelings( unless he's a really gifted communicator:).. and remember we are talking of man here..lol men + talking + emotions = 0!! lol

5. Your well being is of secondary importance. Even if he makes you feel like the only girl in the world… chance are, you’re one of many.. and as replaceable as a lightbulb)

6. Do you really want a man who cheats on his wife? I know men sometimes say they like variety etc, but quite often a cheating man is… *insecure.-selfish.-an ego maniac.-trying to hurt his wife ( or get back at her for some reason) greedy-undisciplined-manipulative-and in some cases.. (not very good in bed.. so needs the practice).

*just a few things I’ve picked up over the years in discussions.. don’t hate me guys:))
If you don’t agree feel free to let me know the real reasons..errr other than biology thanks..!! ( that’s a cop out)


To be fair I’m going to list a few reasons why for many women it works quite well


1. You don’t have to clean up his crap, wash his clothes or even cook for him

2. You can send him home if he gets on your nerves

3. You can have another boyfriend, and if that gets serious.. dump your married lover

4. You don’t have to be emotionally connected..keep it simple.

5. You don’t have to share your money with him

6. It’ll never get boring

7. You know he's an ass and wouldn't want to marry him anyway.. but he's an ass with occasional desirable skills:)


Happy SMSx

1 comment:

  1. I wish I was more clued up when I was married would have done things sooooooo differently. I think back on the nights he used to come home late errhhh we are talking 3am here quite often but I never really questioned it. Perhaps I was too ingrossed in my career to think otherwise. Now I will never know!!!

    Case in point whether he/she is married or not those rules and this post applies to any man who has a woman and has chosen to committ to them in one shape or another. Oh btw I am all too aware men get into this trap too not just women!!!

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